Stars on Gladstone and Helping the President: The Weekly Poll

Last Week's Poll: The New TV Season

Last week we invited our Constant Readers to recommend a consulting-themed television series we here at Consilium could produce in our spare time. (I mean, how hard can it really be, with all the smart folks and cell-phone cameras we have around here?)  Well, the audience has spoken, and our readers are never wrong (right?), so here's how our pilot concepts fared in the crucible of public opinion.

• Top of the Flipcharts (the zany antics of a consulting firm whose staff are all musicians, occasionally bursting in mid-facilitation into fully choreographed production numbers) garnered a miserable 5% of the vote. Put away the accordion, Fred.
• So You Think You Can Consult? (featuring Victor, Chuck, Jennifer and Donald Trump) didn't fare much better  at 11%. You're fired.
• Ron's Anatomy: (cynical, hard-bitten rookies,  wise and sensitive older mentors) and Probie! (cynical, hard-bitten mentor, wise and sensitive rookies) did better, - a respectable 23% each.

But the clear winner was "The World's Oldest Profession - Great Consulting Assignments Through History", with 38% of the votes. All Righty, Then. Our first episode will bring you the hitherto untold story of  Hierasiel, the largely unsung consultant who was hired by Noah to calculate square footage/feed ratio computations for populating the Ark. (This, mind you, in an era when the abacus was cutting edge data processing). Hierasiel is credited with persuading Noah to leave behind the dinosaurs; unfortunately, he disappeared from history when Noah decided to leave him behind as well.

This Week's Poll: Helping Obama

This is, of course, a proudly Canadian blog. Still, we must confess a certain fascination with our good neighbours to the South, whose politics always seem to involve so much more drama than our domestic variety. This month, for example, we have the spectacle of a likeable President who retains a high level of personal popularity while scoring some of the lowest approval ratings in US history. Well, he seems like a nice guy; so we thought we'd put one of the most powerful policy and research teams in the world at his disposal - to wit, our Constant Readership.

President Obama, we know you're a regular  reader of this blog. Pay heed while our audience tells you how to revive your flagging fortunes.

1) Invade something. True, it's a little tough on the country that's being invaded, but it's worked for Presidents before you. Try to pick a place that won't give you too hard a time, with a name that people can pronounce.

2) Spend more time in Europe. They seem to like you better than the folks back home, and the photo ops are great. Bring the wife. Hang out with the Queen. Whatever.

3) Buy a kitten. Everybody likes kittens. And then you can hold a national contest to name it. Then take it on tour. Heck, you can stretch that for months!

4) Get sick. Nothing too serious or debilitating, of course, but it should have a really dramatic name to maximize the sympathy factor. Some options: apocrine pedal bromhidrosis (smelly feet), Beckwith-Wiedemann syndrome (creases in the earlobes), or recidivistic gluteal furunculosis (a recurring boil on the buttocks).

5) Record a duet with Tony Bennett. Hey, it worked for Amy Winehouse.

Alright, Presidential Advisers - let's advise us a President!