In a surprise announcement, Aarluk Vice President Victor Tootoo today announced his candidacy for the newly-formed Facebook Party of Nunavut. "We have never been well served by a Party System that reflects the practices and beliefs of southern Canada,", said Tootoo, a former Deputy Minister of the Government of Nunavut. "The time has come for a new model of governance that reflects the growing sense of community that binds us together. I believe that model is the Facebook Party." The Party's Platform is straightforward, says Tootoo.
- Abolish the Senate, and replace it with a Facebook page. All legislation will be passed or defeated depending on the number of "Likes" it receives.
- Political parties will be replaced by Facebook Groups. Leadership will be assigned on the basis of who scores highest in the "My BFF" app.
- Hansard will be replaced by a team of live-bloggers with Twitter accounts.
- The Canadian Revenue Agency will henceforth collect all taxes by Paypal.
- Management of government will be restructured to reflect a more entertaining and user-friendly interface. Agriculture-Agrifoods Canada, for example, will be replaced by a massive "Farmville" group: Canadian Foreign policy will be determined by how many people in other countries accept our Friend Requests.
Representatives of other parties in Nunavut could not be reached for comment.
April 1, 2011
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